Thursday, December 15, 2011

Sterling Archer is Now an Author

Sterling Archer. Womanizer, Krav Maga specialist, martini master, Emmys dream nominee, ISIS secret agent... and, now, author.

Yes, that's right. Archer—well, the creators of FX animated series Archer—are releasing a book next month titled How to Archer: The Ultimate Guide to Espionage and Style and Women and Also Cocktails Ever Written.

More information on this sure-to-be best-seller after the jump...

Perhaps the best way to describe this gem is to let the back of the book blurb do all the work:
Hi. I see you’re reading the back of my book. This tells me that you either:

A) are hoping to find a brief summary of what to expect from a how-to book by Sterling Archer, the world’s greatest secret agent, or B) don’t know how books work.

If your answer was “A,” your best bet is probably the table of contents, which is where you’ll find the “contents” of this book listed in a convenient, easy-to-read “table” format. So maybe go check that out for a minute and then come back here. I’ll wait...

Pretty cool, right? What other book will teach you how to dress properly and how to drive an elephant? How to field strip an AK-47 and how to haggle with a Thai prostitute—in her native tongue? How to pilot an airboat and how to make about a million delicious cocktails, including a Molotov one? How to kill a guy and how to prepare a fabulous brunch? Plus how to do tons of other stuff that I forgot, but that is nonetheless probably in this book (which, to be honest, I really only kinda skimmed).

So if you want to learn more about how to be more—or at all—like Sterling Archer, the world’s greatest secret agent, quit smearing your greasy fingerprints all over this book and buy it. For one thing, I really need the royalties. For another thing, the last time I checked, this wasn’t a damn library.

(Note: If your answer was “B,” this probably isn’t the book you want to start with.)
I cannot wait to read how Sterling Archer prepares a fabulous brunch. Get me this book immediately. Or, on January 17th when it's released.

Archer returns to FX two days later on January 19. The Season 2 DVDs hit stores on December 27th.

[Image Source: Harper Collins]
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